This past week has felt like a swirling mess in my head and I have noticed that when I am disoriented in life and scheduling, my fitness takes a dive with it. The most productive thing I can probably do in times when I feel like I am overwhelmed or overbooked, would likely be exercise, but these past few days I have felt like turtle-ing up and stopping all forward motion.
I am a paper agenda gal and always have been. I’m a list maker and a training log tracker. I like the visual of the ink on paper, and the ease of checking ahead or looking back. But as life seems to get perpetually busier and I have relationships and people and work and all of the strings that pull me in all directions, I find myself standing at the coffee counter not knowing what it is I wanted to order and scrambling to pull up my app to pay! I have ‘what day is it?’ moments every week and ‘How is it already March?’ feelings monthly.
I have full intentions to stick to my training program for my next race. I am also, frankly, feeling quite stiff, heavy and slow; and NEED to get back to my regular routines and fitness levels before I settle into stretchy pants and no bra, permanently.
I have realized that I need to focus on my priorities and my goals and pull my thoughts from what I have to do tomorrow and next week, to what is on the plate for today and how I can be my regularly scheduled, super-time-managing self, once again. My top picks (besides work; because food and shelter are sort of important) are my relationships and my personal health. Time with my kids. Time with my friends. Time with my boyfriend. Time with my family. Sleep, exercise and alone time!
I am very lucky to have a handful of wonderful and deep friendships with women who seem to understand (and be in the same boat!) that we are probably only able to meet for lunch or coffee or whatever we plan, every few weeks (or sometimes not for months!) *This is actually where I do really appreciate social media, because I may care for you and wonder what’s up, but we all have shit going down and it’s nice to see that you’re still kicking between our face to face times. And surely we all know that some of our ‘friends’ may never see us again, or maybe not for years, but at least we can have some semblance of connection; a loose and floating tie to one another.
The other day I was messaging with my yoga instructor and running an errand with my friend and was saying that I want to be friends with her, as we seem to be kindred spirits and such. My friend joked that I can’t take on any more friends and that all my slots are filled. We laughed and made fake jealous remarks about how no more friends are allowed. But this is sadly the truth for many of us. Between our life obligations and general household responsibilities; to our near and dear friendships and family, it is actually like there are no vacancies at the Inn. And further still, as an adult (and especially with children) the existing friends need to understand cancelled plans and rescheduled dates; late responses to messages and complete lack of handholding and constant validation. I mean I love you girl but I’ll see you in six weeks and I will love you every day until then and after that!
So I am attempting to get with the times and start to use the calendar in my phone. I was discussing the scattered feeling I have and how I’ve double booked myself more than once lately and my lovely boyfriend, who does use his phone planner, said “so do you carry your agenda book with you everywhere and write things down and check it when someone asks you to do something?”
NO I do not! I guess, and look when I get home, and stress out or reschedule like a real adult! Point taken. This morning I plotted in some dates and times into my phone calendar, and it wasn’t a nightmare. I put in work times and scheduled plans that I have in place for the next few months. I am unsure how to use some parts, to be honest, and am not sure how detailed I should get with it; do I put in training plans and everyone’s birthdays? Or do I stick to the places I have to be and plans/appointments I have made, and let the rest fall in around it? Will I get into the habit of checking the date and inserting plans? It does seem easier to reschedule and re-book than some of my pen and paper weeks that have white out, scratches, and arrows as my personal hieroglyphic code.
So here I go, so 3008! (or whatever). I apparently have a kind of busy month and it’s now in color coded lines in my phone. I have a lunch date and a massage booked and some plans ‘penciled’ in with my best friends and my family. Now maybe I can know what day it is and the meaning of life or something….or at least be able to reign my brain back in to be able to order at a coffee shop and not be a clueless and scattered mess….I’d better go get my laundry in the dryer and get ready for my run now.
Periscopecake 