I decided to write this final race series post in two parts. Pre and Post. As I know from racing many times before, sometimes the best intentions don’t pan out as you want them to and sometimes things go better than you imagine that they might. So I wanted to share my before thoughts and my after thoughts without altering the former to fit the narrative of the later. I hope you have enjoyed this series and that I’ve either inspired you to maybe run/race or that I’ve at least offered up a little insight into the mind of a (neurotic)runner preparing for a race; more specifically, a race with a time goal in mind.
Before:
Today is less than 48 hours before race day. I just got back from my last short little easy run of the 12 week program I’ve attended to, and it certainly doesn’t feel like 12 weeks have passed. When I walked in the door I announced “Well, that’s as fit as I’m going to be!’ and my watch mimicked that sentiment when it listed my training status as “peaking”. Thanks watch!
Taper week(s) are always hard because there is a level of doubt that creeps in, and you feel hungry and heavy and antsy. Training goes from many hours a week to just a few, and there is this alternating buzz of feeling fit and ready and maintaining good self talk with this low level feeling of “am I getting a cold?” “did I train hard enough?” and various other little fault lines that threaten your confidence, and the fitness foundation that has been laid. However, this week went progressively well. I ran 5 times, and 4 of those were just short and slow (one had 3 small speed repeats). I generally don’t like running for less than an hour (and I don’t mean that to sound pedantic) because I generally don’t hit my stride until 20 or even 30 minutes in. But I started to like these little runs, and it was kind of relaxing and fun to know I was just out for a half hour and then back to start my day.
I have been diligent with sleep and stretching and not adding extra exercise like biking to work. I have been really thinking positive thoughts and a whole lot of “You can do it!” self talk. My Garmin app predicts a race time of 1:57 and that’s daunting. I totally agree that I could run that time…but I want 1:50! (or at least better than 1:52) to achieve my Personal Best. I have been checking the Vancouver weather and it keeps fluctuating between rain and maybe rain. I am undecided on what to wear and even what shoes to wear. I had just one pair of shoes but in the last few weeks I added another, and they are both very different. One is super cushy and awesome feeling on the down-hills. The regular pair has a bit more road feel and energy return. I am definitely wearing compression socks, as the runs with them are notably better. I guess I’ll decide on the shoes tomorrow morning before we leave for the airport and that’ll be it. Clothes will be the same…
I do feel pretty fit. My training went well and I did the work. The first few weeks that I wasn’t able to do my speed work (harsh temps/conditions) are long gone and presumably of little consequence. I haven’t weight trained in 12 weeks because I felt like running 5 days a week (when I’m used to 3) and being a little more “advanced” in age, was enough for me, and I needed those 2 recovery days per week….plus, once it had been a few weeks, then I knew I’d be sore if I resumed lifting, and I didn’t want to compromise my runs with sore muscles, so it was a downward spiral really, and I’m ok with that. 12 weeks away from the weight room isn’t dire (or that’s what I tell myself currently). I look forward to getting back to lifting and riding my bike more! Even though I do have another half marathon in 6 weeks; this weekend is my “goal race” and that one is more for fun.
I have decided that I will wear my Pace Band Tattoo and look at my pace rather than heart rate (or in conjunction to it). I’ve realized that the heart rate is a bit sketchy at times and that it may be a barrier in some ways. It literally is running with your heart but I think “feel” is also important, and I want to try my best to just make my pace. It will be labored but I know this race needs to be a RACE! I am a tad skeptical about achieving my goal time but I’ll sure as hell try. It’s a relatively flat or “downhill” course (despite some rolling hills that do feel less than “rolling” by the end). It’s also at sea level and I live/train at relatively high elevation (a good 1000m above Vancouver).
So that’s it! I work today and catch a plane tomorrow morning. I am super excited about the weekend away, at the very least. I hope for clear skies but am ok with a little drizzle (please don’t pour!) little to no wind would be the real dream. I’ve been back and forth on the shoes at least 3 times while writing this, and need to make up my damn mind. I don’t think that I’ll try and break my half marathon record again. This is it for me. Not that I won’t train or race hard in the future, but I am not getting any younger and a fast race for me now is what it is, if I can’t beat 7-years-ago me. And I mean that with all levels of straight talk; not self deprecation. I’ll try not to walk too much tomorrow and to stretch and not have copious food or any alcohol…I currently feel positive and excited.
After:
Still in Vancouver and awake in the early morning as I usually am. I am sore. I have been sore after a race before, but today feels especially so. But maybe it’s always been this way and the mind conveniently forgets. We will walk around for hours today (as we did after the race yesterday) and it will be just slower or more labored. Haha.
The race went well but not as hoped or planned…but then again, it kind of went exactly as planned and couldn’t have been better. I’ll break it down:
I woke at around 4:30am and was wide awake. I actually slept pretty well. I had some oatmeal and a coffee (pro-tip: always ask for a kettle, bowl and spoon for your hotel room). I felt good. Awake. Not stiff. Excited. And the weather was pretty awesome; cool and overcast but not raining or especially cold. I got all suited up and my sweet man escorted me to the start and then became my mule so that I could wear a hoodie and gloves and carry stuff but not have to check a bag.
My corral was up front (which took a bit of wading through other runners) after a 20 min Porta potty line for a last-chance bathroom break. It was a 7am start and I was off running! No tech misfortunes or delays. I started out strong and steady and felt great. As assumed, the first kilometer was slower than goal pace…but that’s fine. I had time. I had my temporary pace band tattoo on and was checking the markers as listed. (I also went with the original shoes, not the new cushy ones).
I was running hard but actually very “comfortable” hard. Not unmanageable at all! I was surprising myself. I was not checking my heart rate; only pace and time. My new plan was now “push it on the downhills and flats and then the hills will not lose as much time.” This actually was a good and effective plan, even if it kind of kills your quads in the long term. (Also, my heart rate would have possibly held me up, because it was higher than I thought I could hold, and I may have got in my head about that).
I was feeling good and happy, and my kilometer markings that have an audible notification in my ear (I wore headphones and music) had me right on target! As the kilometers ticked by, I felt good and fought any urges to slow to a more “easy” pace. I was on time! I was hitting the marks within 20 seconds for a long time. 3k, 7k 9k…13k…then the “rolling hills.” Yes, there were some minor climbs earlier, but I slowed down, and they were compensated for on the downhills. I don’t know exactly where but probably around 15km, a portion of a hill was getting my quads burning and my heart rate up too much, so I decided to walk for a small time (“just to that sign up there…”)
I resumed and caught up. During the race I walked through two water stops and had one gel around the one hour mark. Otherwise, straight on running. I was still on time, maybe 30 seconds behind. I had this! Even if I didn’t make 1:50, I was certainly getting better than my 1:52 personal best from 7 years ago….
My quads were feeling it!! I was doing OK cardio wise and over-all slight pain (to be expected) but holy those legs were on fire. I felt the need to walk a bit again around about 18 or 19km. Just a bit…I still got this. Push push push, only 2 or 3 kilometers left!
The final couple kilometers were hard. I had to pull out all of my motivation and positive self talk to keep running as fast as I could and not allow the desire to slow down to overtake the knowledge that I really had maybe 10 mins left to go. I was nearly on time…not going to make 1:50. I saw 1:50 cross my watch at about 20.54km. Less than a kilometer left in the race (although I obviously took some wide corners or something because my watch was consistently 0.2km over the distance markers on the course).
I finished strong. I felt like I might puke or hobble after I stopped, but I pushed that last 500m with all I had. I crossed at 1:54:57 (official is 1:54:55). I did not feel anything but elated. I definitely RACED! I could obesss over the two walk breaks or the two water station walks; but I guarantee that they may have cost me a minute or two tops. I didn’t go out too fast, I didn’t push so hard that I literally couldn’t run by the end. I feel like I really ran my absolute best. Maybe I could have saved a bit in the tank…but personally, I think if I’d gone any slower throughout, I would have reached the same burn by the end but come in slower overall.
I feel really happy about it. It’s a bit sad to consider that maybe a PR is behind me now. But it’s also kind of freeing because I’d like to train hard and race my best but not nearly die trying. And now I feel like I can race a bit less hard in future races. Not, like, “casually,” but not pushing for some specific time goal to beat. And that’s freeing. It also allows new goals to take shape.
I feel fit and proud to run a hard 1:55 half at 45 years old and know that time is fast for me. I am endurance and strength, not speed and agility. Haha
So today I’ll walk and have difficulty stepping off curbs and going up hills. Then when I get home, I’ll resume activity for my next half, in six weeks (that I plan to be a bit less hard). I can’t wait to get lifting again and riding my bike more!
All this effort and training in a new way, and running more frequently, was amazing and a great lesson for me. It really altered my beliefs about what I can and can’t do. I hopefully inspired you in some way, to push harder, try something different than you’re used to or even just gain some insight into running overall.
Periscopecake 